Kassiquan

A Heart's Song

I was in my last year of high school when I started to write my own song lyrics and music with my guitar.  Later, I was invited to sing some of the songs I would write during Chapel services on Sunday afternoons. One of the very first songs I wrote has the following verse.

I always wished that I could fly

Had two wings and took to the sky

Never knowing that I’d soon will

Be able to fly and walk the earth still

In my adolescent years I would have dreams at night about flying.  My dreams would always start off with my walking out of the house turn right or left onto the avenue, run and bounce off the ground like Superman; the televised version played by George Reeves.  I would find myself hovering above the streets flying below the electric wires and then try to get above beyond the electric wires and trying not get tangled in them.  These dreams would be so very real and often repeated in my childhood, through Junior and High School.  I can recall how clear these dreams were; I was really flying and then I would wake up realizing it was just a dream.  Sometimes, I would dream that when I would leap to take off, I couldn't; I would be stuck on the ground.  When I finally moved out of the house I found my dream about flying slowly disappear.  

The song I wrote reveals a portion of my story.  As a teenager I used to imagine that I had the powers like Samantha Stevens on Bewitched or Genie on I Dream of Genie.  When I would be outside with my friends, we would pretend that we have super powers and I would be Shazam, the Cartoon Genie.  I grew up in a home with violence; Dad always beating on Mom or beating on my brother and me, living in a neighborhood with gangs in wars over street corner ownership carrying switchblades and bats and a few with guns.  I wanted a better life and fantasizing was a way out, at least for a while.

In high school there was a change.  I decided to dedicate my life to Christ and went back to the Chapel to which I first asked Jesus to come into my heart when I was about five or six years old.  I heard about the rapture, resurrection and being caught up in the air through a neighbor who shared a lot with me about the rapture.  I discovered that I could really “fly in the spirit” in God’s presence; a spiritual high.  After dedicating myself to Christ, I noticed the dreams about flying were less frequent.  And then when I moved out my own the dreams stopped.  I wrote the song about flying because now I can spiritually fly.

The Bible says that once our lives are given to Christ and filled with his Spirit we are endowed with spiritual gifts; there was one gift that the Bible mentions in the story of Joseph, which is mentioned in a book by Herman Riffle that I picked up and read, Your Dreams: God’s Neglected Gift.  I read his book because I know dreams say something; especially if they are repeated.  Riffel’s book validated what I was already thinking when my dreams started to repeat.  My dreams about flying were telling me that I was searching for freedom from a life of abuse and violence in my home and in the neighborhood.  I believe in dreams; I pay attention to mine but not on the crazy ones you have after you just ate a big meal before bed or when you just finished watching a frightening or suspense thriller movie. I am talking about those dreams that seem to know what you are thinking and feeling; that touch on things that involve challenging decisions.  I do not have those dreams about flying, escaping because I am free.  I can fly and walk the earth still."  What are your dreams like?  Are there some that are trying to get your attention?  Dreams can be a mirror.

"The dream is the mirror of the soul, revealing what goes on in one's inner life."

Herman Riffel

 Here are the rest of the words to the song I wrote so long ago; my story.

I used to live in a world of make believe

A world that only I could conceive

Then I met my Savior above

I now live in His world of Love

I always wished of having no worry or care

In my fantasy world you’d find me there.

Now that Jesus is in my heart to stay

My fantasy world is now thrown away

I used to live in a fantasy dream

To escape troubles I’ve often seen

Then I opened my empty heart’s door

I now won’t have to dream any more